Self-Talk

I find myself thinking about all of the total bullshit I've been feeding myself for years and wondering why. When did I start thinking it was ok to talk to myself with such distaste? I would never EVER talk to my friends and family this way. 

Trying to date in 2021, not even taking into the account that it is a freaking pandemic, has been exhausting, disappointing and eye opening, to say the least. I will say that I have made some friends along the way, and for that, I am grateful. It hasn't been all bad, and I definitely learned a lot, but it has brought on an awful lot of negative self-talk and questioning. Am I not attractive enough? Not thin (far from thin, but you get it) enough ? Not funny enough? Not engaging enough? Too shy? Too forward? So much self-doubt and why?? Because some dude, pretending to be someone he isn't, didn't "like" my profile fast enough or stopped chatting with me after I didn't immediately fall for his cringe-worthy pick-up line? Come on, girl! 

I have said terrible things about my general intelligence, or lack there of, when I can't help my child with math homework and have to send her to ask her father....but how does this have any reflection on my overall intelligence or capabilities as a human? It doesn't! The way they do math in school these days is so long and drawn out. It makes ZERO sense to anyone born in the 80's, unless of course you're a teacher or math wiz. Am I right??

Somedays I am lazy, but that doesn't mean that I AM lazy. It means that I'm exhausted from driving 3 kids to jobs, sports, singing, their friends houses, etc....running errands, working full-time, attempting to have a social life and every other thing that life presents a single mom. Sometimes you miss the 6am workout, not because you're lazy, but because sleep is necessary to exist. Sometimes the dishes don't get done and the laundry goes through the washer twice, but it's all ok. 

You picked up fast food for supper, maybe even twice this week- doesn't mean you're a failure as a parent. You worked all day, chauffeured the kiddos around, and somehow it's 6pm and you need groceries. Buy the to-go meal and throw the negative self-talk out the dang window! You got all the things done and everyone is fed. Start fresh tomorrow. I still call this day a win. 

Just because someone doesn't like you does not mean you aren't likeable. We aren't all created to like each other. Respect each other? Yes, but like each other? Heck no! Just because you do something dumb, doesn't mean you are dumb. Just because you have a lazy day does not mean you are lazy! We need to stop this negative self-talk! We need to talk to ourselves how we would talk to our most cherished loved ones. You have GOT to love yourself! When you love yourself right you show others how to do the same.