A Mom's love for her son

I don't think anyone or anything could have prepared me for my son going off to university. The grief is real.

I truly remember his first day of kindergarten like it was yesterday...or at least more recently than 13 years ago. I cried that day. My baby was leaving home without me for the first time. It felt like he didn't need me, although obviously my little 5 year old still needed me.

Now, here we are...he's 18 and gone to university. It REALLY feels like he doesn't need me. It feels like he has moved out and moved on, despite 95% of his things still being at home in his room...100% of him is away at school.

This kid. I wonder if he understands how much I love him? How much he changed my life? How incredibly proud I am of the man he is becoming? He has grown so much these past 2 years. He has found hobbies and interests and has a drive and desire to expand as a human. I am so blessed to be his Mom.

I have been a Mom for basically 19 years. I have devoted my life to my kids and have no regrets. I forget what anything felt like before my kids. Did I have hobbies? I must have... Did I take better care of myself and my needs? I must have... 

The time has flown by since that first day of school...since the first time my baby became a little boy. Now he hovers over me and has to lean down to hug me. Now he's a young man. Where did the time go??

People tell you how fast the time will go. They tell you to live in the moment and how each stage will be gone in a blink. I wanted them to be wrong. They weren't.

That kid took a piece of my heart with him. I hope he never forgets that I am here. I hope he never forgets how much I love him. 

Being a Mom is the hardest. You love them with your whole heart. You sacrifice yourself for them and their well-being and then they're on their way to adulthood and independence. Was it worth it? Absolutely!